Some information and links to organisations that can support you
While we hope our guide has given you tips on how to identify manipulation and has made you more confident, there are many resources out there that could be useful to you. We have compiled a few that are particularly relevant and helpful below. This is a work in progress and we will be updating it. This is why you will find many of the links are relevant only for the UK as most of the volunteers who worked on this guide are based in UK.
To have a safe space to talk to strangers about your relationship: 7 Cups of tea [global]
In the UK, there are many options:
Women’s Aid 0808 2000 247 (Freephone 24hr National Domestic Violence Helpline run in partnership with Refuge)
Samaritans - Telephone: 116 123
Support for male survivors of abuse 0808 801 0327
The UK Children’s Charity: NSPCC 0808 800 5000
Childline a free, private and confidential service if you are 18 or under in the UK - 0800 1111
Spotting the signs
How to recognise and handle manipulative relationships
a very quick, 11-point guide, from Bustle
an easy-to-read illustrated guide from Wikihow
A more in-depth look at how to recognise and handle manipulative behaviour from Psychology Today
Emotional abuse is damaging to your health and self-esteem, and affects all aspects of your life. Read some of the signs that people who have been in these situations have shared here, in Tweet form
Financial abuse in relationships - Huffington Post outlines some of the signs here
Manipulation is not just limited to romantic relationships - partners, family, friends, carers, teachers and work colleagues may also be perpetrators. Business Insider wrote about this here
Age UK provides a definition of elder abuse and advice on protecting yourself here
Culture-specific abuse signs are outlined in this blog post
Preparing to leave an abusive relationship
Leaving an abusive relationship - read one woman’s story here
Making a safety plan in preparation of leaving an abusive relationship is here
Communications tips and techniques to remind yourself it’s not you can be found here
It is encouraging to see many countries are taking important steps to include emotional abuse in existing legislation as well as introducing new legislation on domestic abuse. One such case is the UK.
The UK Government has published a Statutory Guidance Framework on Controlling and Coercive Behaviour in an Intimate or Family Relationship here. This created a new offence of controlling or coercive behaviour.
Remember,manipulation and coercive control - that is the use of force or intimidation to obtain compliance - is illegal in England and Scotland. New powers will target perpetrators who subject spouses, partners and other family members to serious psychological and emotional torment, but stop short of violence.